Watching movies like Liam, Hearts in Atlantis, Paradise, The Children of Heaven or The Secret Garden gives me this heavenly chill that I can't really describe. I never will be able to. My whole life I have been chasing a dream of a life that I know I can never attain. The more I live my life and the older I get the farther away I become from my dream. Thinking about it right now gives me that weird pain in my throat that according to my mom we can feel when we hold our cries. Relating myself to the child characters in these movies I really feel their pains and sorrows like it's all happening to me. But I don't wanna cry. So instead, in the smiles and joys of those kids, I try to find the joy that I cannot get from my own life... imagining myself to be in a garden with flowers, butterflies and sunshine forever with any worries or anything. Be a kid again.
Yes that's what I want... and exactly what I can never get. You see the only difference between me and the children potrayed in all of these movies is that they got their answers & their lives, but I never will, never can.
Posted in Worthless on November 3, 2003 9:36 AMNever lose hope yar... keep praying until u get what you want...and u will for sure...
btw would u mind sharing your boring dreams with us :p
well hello haydar,
i have no idea how this blog thing actually works infact whether it works at all or not :- ) but i just Had to put in a word regarding what you said.
"a DREAM you know that you can never attain" ???? and how do u KNOW for sure??? how does anybody know for sure huh?
but u r right maybe the older we get the more apparent it becomes that dreams are maybe just that dreams :- (( nothing more ,nothing less.as children it is easier to believe in the impossible,in the unseen,in what we want,in what we believe that we need :- ) why does it all change as we grow older.can't we even have faith in our own visions ???
i do not like it atall and come what may somehow i still choose to believe in my dreams.i still hold on to what i want.stupid??? maybe but who knows for sure huh?? that's what keeps me holding on.really you should aswell :- )
all my best.
p.s your mom seems like one intelligent lady :- ) lucky you!!!
The dream is to live a life in my past and change it. You see dreams don't always have to be for something that is in the future.
Posted by: Haydur at November 10, 2003 10:19 PMInteresting paradox !
Since I cannot pray that you actually achieve the impossible that you so desire, let me pray that you find in your future what you see in your past.
Thanks :)
Posted by: Haydur at November 11, 2003 9:29 PMyou are very welcome :-)
Posted by: Hina at November 12, 2003 10:53 PMhttp://www.haydur.com/logs/mt-tb.cgi/127
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